Heeey - 04.07.03 - 3:17 am
Look!

This has to be quick because I have to start waking up with the duck again. Which means...in four hours, I will be dragging my ass out of bed, only to be greeted by an irate Howie who only wants his romaine and chickens. No, I'm kidding. The duck is always happy to see me in the morning and I am always happy to see him.

I am doing OK.

Not much has changed, except for the fact that I now feel guilty for flipping out like that. Oh, hush. Guilt is a familiar feeling and I fucking like it, OK?

You know what? I don't really think I am capable of writing about anything right now that involves emotions and revelations. I am sleepy and kinda buzzed.

Yesterday was fucking amazing.

May and I went beach-hopping and it's true what they say about vitamin D. The more, the merrier. By the time I came home, I felt like everything would be all right. I talked to my best friend tonight and we decided that, no matter what, everything will have a happy ending. We will do what we have to and life will be good. "Do what we have to" does not involve AKs, by the way. I asked.

So, yeah. Yesterday.

A very large and sexy Russian guy at Subway talked to me about tattoos. And then he showed me his. I was wearing a white a-shirt (that's what they're called, right?), my swimmin' shorts and my hair was doing something that resembled orange snakes copulating. In other words, I was not at my best. But I still smiled.

Then I heard Tom Petty on the radio.

And saw some baby ducks.

And a cherry red GTO.

We were at a stoplight and I started yelling about shit. Loosely paraphrased: Ah! Fuck it! A big sexy Russian guy talked to me! Tom Petty! I fucking saw some baby ducks! I FUCKING LOVE BABY DUCKS. Life rules, May!

I stopped to take a breath and noticed that there was a rather attractive young man in the car next to us. He was smiling at me and when he saw me look over, he winked.

OK, you guys? You know how most people can't pull off the sexy wink and end up looking like fucking losers when they try?

He totally pulled it off.

And to make the day even cooler, I saw another attack armadillo. Fucking armadillos and their crazy kung fu attack skills.

So now I'm tired and I should get to bed. Oh, shit! Almost forgot....

I WROTE A STORY.

Yeah. That alone is why I'm not shoving forks in my eyeballs for fun.

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