I'M SEXY! - 08.15.03 - 5:02 pm
Look!

I never realized how many soft foods I hate with a passion strong enough to snuff out a million suns. Why the fuck do I want to eat soft noodles? My mom asked me if I'd like some klusky noodles and I started crying. I HATE KLUSKY NOODLES. I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO SPELL KLUSKY, GODDAMNIT. I love my mom, though. She's nice to me when really she should just kick me in the ass every so often.

And fuck scrambled eggs, too. Stupid scrambled eggs with stupid gross yolk all mixed in and shit.

I also never want to eat anything that comes from any part of a cow again.

And grits? BAD IDEA. Stupid tiny, sneaky grits.

OK, so maybe I'm being just a wee bit overdramatic MONKEY! MONKEY ON TV! I NO LONGER WANT TO KILL! Anyway, maybe I'm being just a wee bit melodramatic and annoying the hell out of everyone who comes in contact with me for longer than a quarter of a second, but I miss food, you guys. More specifically, I miss sandwiches. Big sandwiches with all sorts of cool shit in them. And do you know how it is, when all you want is ONE THING and you can't have it and everything else sucks cuz of that? Do you?

Three more days until the stitches come out. Hooray!

Last night, May, her brother, his friend and I went to the diner and the stupid funny bastards kept making me laugh, like, a lot and THAT'S NOT GOOD. It hurts and now my mouth is kinda sore and annoyed. It's cool, though. I have drugs.

I think I'm going to go out tonight and try to pick up boys by offering to show them my stitches. Like, "Hey, hottie. Wanna see my stitches?" Who could resist? I'm cute and I HAVE STITCHES.

Speaking of which: Hey, hottie. Wanna see my stitches?

The Perseids peak was a couple days ago and I almost hate myself for missing it, but then I remembered- I was very drugged and in pain and it was very stormy the night of the peak. It would have just made me cry.

I stayed up until 7 this morning, though, and watched the skies for hours. I saw two. Two. From the hours of 4-6:30, I saw two goddamn meteors. I am thoroughly convinced that all the awesome meteors were going on right behind my back. There's a metaphor for life somewhere in there and I'll let you find it.

I did some good thinkin', though.

OK, I'm going to go now and read some books. I like books, man.

Oh! May and I have completed our plans for the H-Arr!-dcore Camping Trip 2003 and now we just have to wait. Plans changed again and I'm going to type up the stories for my two year anniversary.

I am totally not paying attention to what I am typing.

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