I'm a fucking idiot, OK? I know this and accept this and have even met its parents. Me and idiocy are down like whoa. (Yes, I am aware that sentence is grammatically incorrect. Shove it.) All I can say is it could be worse. I could be, like, dead and shit.

End disclaimer.

Anyway, I seriously thought I broke my wrist tonight. Pretend it happened by me doing something noble like saving a sack of kittens from a rampaging tractor or something. Or just accept my reason of the wall sassed me and I had to throw down. Whichever.

Oh, dude. How fucking awesome am I? I can still totally take my bra off without removing my shirt. TRUE.

So, yeah, story. It looked really fucking gross and I was making sand in my mouth from gritting my teeth in pain. Ice, Weezer, telling myself knock-knock jokes...nothing helped and at midnight I walked to the hospital. There, I made many friends. No, I didn't. An old man with no teeth mocked me for not ringing the assistance bell thing after I had waited for an hour with no help. He offered to hold my hand while I did it then recoiled in fear when seeing that it looked like my wrist was about to give birth to triplets.

Fucker.

The people helping me kept saying broken and cast and ew and I was getting ready to punch myself in the face for being so fucking dumb. Then I got x-rayed and there's no breaks. Hooray! Well, no. They're gonna have the radiologist look the x-rays over in the morning cuz they can't accept the fact that my bones are super awesome and unbreakable. Except for that one time, but I digress.

Not that it really matters if it's actually fractured or not cuz it'll still hurt like hell and the brace will still be coming off as soon as I get sick of it. Which was, like, an hour ago.

Oh, hey, funny story. While I was sitting in the x-ray room, waiting for the technician, I noticed a Halloween skeleton decal on the window. After I had stared at it for a few minutes, I realized that it was missing an arm bone. I wondered where the arm bone went and checked all around for it. Nothing. Commence staring at skeleton. A few more minutes go by and then I noticed that its feet were where its hands should be and vice versa. I giggled to myself. Hee hee. Good ol' FeetHands. More staring. At least five minutes worth. Finally, I see that the missing arm bone has been stuck to the window all along and why is it between its...OHMYGODPENIS. BONE PENIS! It's a...BONER! HA HA HA HA! Get it? Boner? AH HA HA HA HA.

Yeah.

I think it's time for bed. You'd think that with the pain caused by typing I would try to make this entry worthwhile.

Sucker.

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