All right. This has been the longest, I think, that I've gone w/out writing in here. Sorry. I was kinda having a...fit. Yeah. Viva la fucking Christmas. I have a couple things to post, but I think I'll do the New Years thing before the Christmas one cuz New Years is right around the corner.

Boy Resolutions for 2002 or Am I Fucking Kidding Myself?

1) Quit spilling your guts onto a piece of paper, slapping a stamp on it, and dropping it into a random mailbox around town. Especially while drunk.

2) With that in mind, stop carrying stamps on your person when you know there will be drinking that day. Hell, stop carrying stamps, period.

3) Show some goddamn emotion. Cry. Get snarky. Call him on being a dumbass. Get angry when he fucks up. You don't always have to be so poised. You are a woman. Roar.

4) Forget about him. And him. Oh, and him, too. Burn effigies, if you must.

5) Look into local convents.

6) Keep crying at those sappy sitcom episodes. You are not a wuss nor are you stupid. Tears are an antiseptic, no matter what the cause.

7) Your duck likes everybody. Stop using him as an indicator of a boy's worth.

8) Quit calling the boy while blitzed. You'll only ask him a million and one questions, which you will later forget the answers to. Unless, of course, you are calling for closure (ala Rachel in that one episode of Friends...you know. With the borrowed cell phone? Then, she throws it in the champagne bucket...? Nevermind). Then you can laugh about it later. Cuz drunken closure calls/encounters are like wine...they get better with time.

9) TIME and PROCESS. Learn them, conquer them, accept them.

10) Make out with Jimmy Fallon.

11) Cute boy? Flirt.

12) And for fuck's sake, you are young. Have fun.

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