It's a joke. Get it? Ha ha...nevermind - 04.01.02 - 12:25 am
Look!

I've decided that I'm shaving my head.

Here are the five main reasons:

1) Have you looked at how much good hair dye is selling for these days? Even the crappy kind can run up to 8 dollars at some stores. And, yes, I realize that I do not need to constantly dye my hair, but if you grew up w/people constantly asking if your hair was naturally grey (in the winter) or spewing one dumb blonde joke after another (in the summer), you would want some change, too.

2) It's Florida. It's hot. Sweaty hair makes your neck itch and your face break out cuz you're constantly pushing it out off your forehead.

3) An extension of reason #2- ponytails give me headaches.

4) "Does the carpet match the drapes?" Actually, nevermind that. I just realized how a shaved head could warrant that stupid question.

5) Low maintenence, dude. Not that I really brush my hair or anything...it just kinda does what it wants (i.e. not a damn thing) regardless of what I do.

You know what? This was going to be an April Fool's joke, but now I've gone and convinced myself that I should just Bic it. Damnit. K needs to be alive right now so I can call him up to tell him that I'm moving to New York. I did this every single year for, like, six years and he fell for it every time. Even when I started the conversation w/"Happy April Fool's Day!"

Here's to another holiday I should just give up on.

Anyway, even though my parents are 'recovering Catholics' (their words, not mine), we still had a mini-Easter dinner. Typical Polish fare plus Cadbury Creme Eggs for dessert. The highlight of the meal was when my face turned bright red from eating too much horseradish. I love the stuff and am usually able to eat a spoonfull over an egg half w/out so much as a blink. Except my dad got a different, much stronger brand, and I think I have been braised from the inside out.

In other news, my sinuses are clear as bright blue day.

<<< TOP >>>

Forever 23, my ass - 01.25.06

P-Nutz - 01.20.06

My nose hurts - 01.16.06

And really bad eggs - 01.13.06

I ain't no Alex Trebek - 01.11.06