100% Alligator Free Entry! - 07.01.03 - 1:25 am
Look!

Doo doo doo doo doo.

I have a disease, you guys. A disease that can only be thwarted by 666 COLD MEDICINE. How fucking ecstatic was I when I finally purchased 666 COLD MEDICINE?

Answer- Very fucking.

I have this urge to go out and do something totally evil and wrong so I could be like, "Dude, the devil made me do it. Don't hate." And have it be an ACTUAL VALID EXCUSE.

Hey. I just realized this: there's evil in devil.

Whoa. Mindfuck.

Did I ever tell you about my cat, Monkey? I didn't think so.

There's this tomcat that hangs around my house and it's stripy orange with eyes to match. Seriously. His eyes are so orange, they're almost red. It's pretty intense.

I love Monkey.

He's, like, really sweet and he never digs his claws into you when he's kneading. I've almost convinced my mom to let him move in with us. I mean, it would totally kick ass. I'd have this freaky cat named Monkey who loved me with all his heart and he already has a healthy fear of poultry so why the hell not?

His name was once Stinky but then my parents were like "You can't name every single animal you come across Stinky." They're kinda right, I guess. It gets a little confusing after awhile.

So I changed his name to Monkey. Which, by the way, is a total shout-out.

Yeah.

I want to color some shit with my brand new markers. That sounds fun.

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