3am:

My stupid fucking internet connection is down or something and I'm thinking that maybe this is what some know as a "sign" and I shouldn't update my journal. Cuz honestly? I'm a little pissed and feeling philosophical. That right there is the diary equivalent of the bleach/ammonia combo.

Thank god for Notepad. Know what I'm saying?

And now back to your regularly scheduled programming.

Work sucked it, long and hard. Crazy busy at first and then nothing. I got caught up on my staring, though. And I learned that suppressing rage will only lead me to take an extra ten minutes for my break to smoke cigarettes in the park and try not to vomit.

This woman I work with apparently killed a snake this past weekend and she's been telling the story for days. If I type it out, I will have to put my fist through the screen so hows about I just say that she had a bit of a problem finishing the job. In fact, I had a fleeting thought that maybe I should warn her that if someone overheard her and reported the incident, she could face animal cruelty charges. Yeah, it was that bad. And I got to hear the story at least five times. Of course, each time she told it, she got louder and gorier. She was actually fucking proud of herself, like she saved the entire goddamn world by killing a garter snake.

She says it was after her bird's eggs. It wasn't until today I found out that the bird in question is wild and she assumed the snake would, sooner or later, get the eggs. Fucking shit, man.

And now I can't get it out of my head. I keep thinking about my neighbor in South Florida who would kill any snake she saw with a rake. I witnessed many of these killings while playing with my She-Ra doll in the banana plants. She gave us some fake fruit once and we still have it and I still think about that stuff when I see the plastic grapes.

12:30pm:

There's actually more to that entry, but I don't feel like posting it. It's really just some ramblings on feminism and self-injury and how I believe Jerkface doesn't want me cuz I'm a little off or what the fuck ever. You see? Like you would actually read through that entire thing and can I count this as my sole act of charity for the day? I think I can.

Hold on. I want to smoke a cigarette.

OK, then.

The duckling has taken to sitting on her eggs all day now and I'm going to be really sad for her if they don't hatch. I told my mom that in a few weeks, I should go find some baby ducks so the duckling can feel like her efforts weren't futile. I should go get the little yellow baby ducks at the flea market. They're probably Pekins.

Oh, hee hee. My mom was trying to figure out how loud a bantam rooster can crow. I think she misses my rooster almost as much as I do. I never have talked about that, have I? One day, one day.

I should be revising right now. It's Thursday, isn't it? Fuck.

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